This month, rather than giving you week to week snapshots of my life, I am choosing to write about things the Lord has been teaching me for some time now. So hang around for a more serious than normal post and a brief little summary of some fun things I did in January at the end.

Submission… A word that my pride does NOT get along with well. I like things my way. I like control. I like the applause of others when I do something well. My arrogance and my pride don’t like being put in the background, even for the sake of others. It’s the reality of the flesh, the reality of temptation and the spiritual warfare that goes on each and everyday in a world governed by the prince of the power of the air (Ephesians 2:2). If it were up to me, my pride would win the battle every single time and humility would have no place in my life. So, the Lord has been teaching me about submission to Him.

That last paragraph seemed pretty hopeless, right? It is. Without Jesus. Without the Holy Spirit. Without the goodness of the Lord to finish the good work He began in our lives (Philippians 1:6). Without those things, it’s hopeless. The good news is that it isn’t up to me. The Lord is the one who sanctifies. The Lord is the one who brings me into submission. Does this truth free me from responsibility? Nope. Not one bit. I am called to holiness, and I must pursue the Lord through Scripture and prayer. Do I understand how the sovereign will of the Lord to sanctify me also corresponds with my responsibility to work out my own salvation with fear and trembling? Nope. But my finite mind has chosen to be okay with that.

Since the pandemic sent the world into mass chaos in March, I have seen more and more that I am totally, utterly, 100% out of control. Remember earlier when I said I like control? Yeah, well, since the pandemic began I have been in quite the learning curve. A virus showed up and suddenly I could no longer do things my way, and this continues to be the case now, almost an entire year later.

Frustration… Rather than recognizing that the Lord was in control when a virus began stealing lives and piling more and more anxiety up in the hearts and minds of people across the globe, I chose to be frustrated. Thinking back, I do believe some frustration was and still is warranted. Restrictions are illogical, hinder ministry, and have shut the door of many churches. That is frustrating. People I care about have lost loved ones. That is heartbreaking. Families are separated, people are scared, and there is no end in sight. That. Is. Frustrating. But, we worship a sovereign God who is present in the midst of it all, and whose plans remain good and perfect. That is comforting.

I allowed frustration to build so much that the smallest of things in life became the biggest of things. I was angry, frustrated, emotional, and confused for weeks and months. I was angry at people who were just trying to love me well. I was drained. I felt like I was walking backwards rather than toward the Lord. Why? Because I wasn’t submitting to His will. I wasn’t trusting that He was still sovereign. I forgot that I am not called to be in control of all things and do everything my way. I am called to holiness. I am called to submission to my Creator and Sustainer.

What is submission? I’ve said the word over and over. But what is it? Simply put, it is giving up my wants, my desires, and my ways for those of the Lord. It is looking at every situation, no matter how small, and saying, “Not my will Father, but yours be done,” like my Savior did when He was obediently going to die (Luke 22:42). How do I do this? By taking every thought captive and giving it over to the Lord, praying that His will be carried out in and through me (2 Corinthians 10:5). Will I do this perfectly? No. Never. But I can take comfort that the Lord’s will is that I be sanctified, made more like Jesus, one degree of glory at a time.

Practically, what should submission of my own life look like each day? It looks like putting aside my desires to better serve and prefer others, especially those in the fellowship of believers. It should lead me to be like Paul, who would “gladly spend and be spent” even for the souls of those who are unfaithful and unloving to him, who offer him nothing in return. It should lead me to humility, to a place where the only thing I know to do is utter the name of Christ Jesus my Lord.

What has the Lord been teaching me? How to submit. What it looks like. How it will change my heart. And that His will is much greater than my own.

Believer, what call does the Lord place on your life? It’s clear in His Word… Submission to Him.

Unbeliever, what call does the Lord place on your life? It’s clear in His Word. Repent, believe, submit. Isaiah 55:7 “Let the wicked one abandon his way and the sinful one his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, so He may have compassion on him, and to our God, for He will freely forgive”.

— MO

January Life Update

• I got the opportunity to work with 3 different group of students, run lots of recreation, work hard, have fun, and rest hard.
• I got to hear of a student who repented of her sins and submitted her life to the Lordship of Jesus after having left camp the weekend prior still condemned in darkness. That was a beautifully answered prayer and a very happy text message to receive.
• I traveled to Boone, NC with some fun people to snowboard and earn some new bruises and sore muscles.
• I took 7 crazy little humans bowling with BP and had great car conversation about how “deep and philosophical” Frozen 2 is.
• We ended the month at camp with the College Retreat where I got to see so many friends that I labored alongside over two different summers.
• The beginning of February brings many new and exciting things that you’ll have to wait until next month to hear about.